I find myself spending a good amount of time at my desk and working on my computer, in my makeshift home office area, which I do like. Whether it be working on some photography, writing, doing some research and reading; to include other people’s blogs or some books I picked up. Looking back over the past two years, reflecting on events and people, I can see how I’ve grown mentally and in my own way spiritually. Both of which have led to a healthy me, despite the extra few pounds I’ve added. I like reflecting on the past, not ruminating, but revisiting. We learn from our past, or we should, provided we do not get caught up in all the “what ifs”, “should haves”, and “if only”. The past is done, no changing it and not worth the time running down that rabbit hole. But, if we can reflect with genuine neutrality, we can then learn from the past.
My 2016 was the rock bottom; I found myself in a dark place mentally and even took the steps to end the precious life I was given. Amazingly, I got help and like the old saying goes “Once you’re at rock bottom there is only one way to go, up.” Up I did go and learned a lot about myself and helpful coping skills.
My 2017 was a whirl wind of two steps forward and one step back. I was in that in-between stage of thinking I knew what I wanted and thinking I knew what I didn’t want, a lot of thinking taking place. My neurotransmitters were firing all over the place as I worked the heck out of my brain. However, through it all I was getting better at reflecting on the past and learning, limiting the ruminating thoughts and replacing them with empathy towards myself, but not a pity party. My word for 2017 was “Believe” and I did. When things got rough I stopped, reassured myself, and said “I believe in you Brendan”.
2018 is now here, we are fifteen days into it and I’m feeling quite good about it so far. My mantra for 2018 is “I am not running a sprint, I am running a marathon”. For me this is critical to remember and to remind myself. We live in a want it now – get it now kind of world, but with my Passion and Goals I know it will be a couple of years before I complete my marathon. I’m OK with that. I am looking forward to my journey and to learning as I go.
I once thought Art, particularly Fine Art Photography was my true passion. I realized I do enjoy it and it can be a means of happiness for me and others. But, once I looked at all the signs, the coincidences (which are signs too), and how my life was interacting with others I realized what I wanted and what I needed to do. So, back to school I go, I start January 20th, and I’ll be working towards a MS in Psychology with a focus on counseling. I know the difference I can make is in helping others. Help them learn, deal with events, and find the light that is needed for them.
So friends, reflect, learn, and grow from the past. I promise it’ll assist you with your passion. And, remember; it’s not a sprint, but a marathon. Enjoy
About the Author
I’ve always been involved in the arts. My grandmother and father were both portrait painters, so it was something I was immersed in. However, something about photography captivated me. The ability to capture a visual story entices me, for I have always been a bit of a storyteller and I enjoy writing too. My photography has received numerous awards; from publication in Popular Photography to 2015 Best in Show image at The Texas State Fair, regional and national awards in photography, my artwork is in private collections around the world, and I have two books out “Beyond The Image” and “Finding Myself: Visual Tales of an Explore”. I continue to challenge myself and I’m always looking for a new story to make and capture.